Citater på engelsk

Citater på engelskHer er listen spækket med citater på engelsk. Nogle kender du helt sikker i forvejen da de er oversat til dansk, mens andre har du aldrig hørt om. Jeg har prøvet at sammensætte en liste med sjove citater, skulle det ske at du gerne vil have flere engelske citater, så vil jeg selvfølgelig øge den gevaldig. For der er nemlig nok at tage af. Men gå du bare i gang med at læse, så kan vi se hvor mange du når i gennem.

  • The four most beautiful words in our common language: “I told you so”.
    – Gore Vidal
  • Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
    – Jules Renard

  • It’s simple, if it jiggles, it’s fat.
    – Arnold Schwarzenegger
  • Red sky at night, shepherd’s delight. Blue sky at night, day.
    – Tom Parry
  • I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.
    – Robin Williams
  • I don’t want to brag, but I do speak pig Latin; I mean, I’m not fluent, but I’m sure if I ever went there, I could get by.
    – Bonnie McFarlane
  • A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
    – Jay Leno
  • Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m schizophrenic, and so am I.
    – Oscar Levant
  • If people say they just love the smell of books, I always want to pull them aside and ask, To be clear, do you know how reading works?
    – Bridger Winegar
  • General Mills is coming out with an organic Twinkie. Isn’t that called a sponge?
    – Jay Leno
  • People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
    – Isaac Asimov
  • The closest a person ever comes to perfection is when he fills out a job application form.
    – Stanley Randall
  • We’ve begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It’s cheaper, and you get more feet.
    – Rita Rudner
  • Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
    – Will Rogers
  • I’m writing my book in fifth person, so every sentence starts out with: “I heard from this guy who told somebody…”
    – Demetri Martin
  • I don’t know that there are real ghosts and goblins, but there are always more trick-or-treaters than neighborhood kids.
    — Robert Brault
  • I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
    – Winston Churchill
  • Nature abhors a vacuum, but not as much as a cat does.
    – Anonymous
  • How can you ever be late for anything in London? They have a huge clock right in the middle of the town.
    – Jimmy Kimmel
  • A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
    – Steve Martin
  • Here’s some advice: At a job interview, tell them you’re willing to give 110 percent. Unless the job is a statistician.
    – Adam Gropman
  • Halloween is the beginning of the holiday shopping season. That’s for women. The beginning of the holiday shopping season for men is Christmas Eve.
    – David Letterman
  • No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.
    – Abraham Lincoln
  • Whoever named it necking is a poor judge of anatomy.
    – Groucho Marx
  • Flere engelske citater

  • How come you never see a headline like “Psychic Wins Lottery”?
    – Jay Leno
  • Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
    – Jim Carrey
  • Try an internship! Internships give you all the experience of a summer job without the hassle of a paycheck.
    – Stephen Colbert
  • A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.
    – Don Marquis
  • My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned 60 and that’s the law.
    — Jerry Seinfeld
  • If con is the opposite of pro, then isn’t Congress the opposite of progress?
    – Jon Stewart
  • A woman’s mind is cleaner than a man’s: She changes it more often.
    – Oliver Herford
  • There’s no “I” in denial.
    – Peter Serafinowicz
  • Sometimes I think war is God’s way of teaching us geography.
    – Paul Rodriguez
  • If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
    – Robin Williams
  • What should you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
    – George Carlin
  • What are they planting to grow the seedless watermelon?
    – Jerry Seinfeld
  • If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
    – Jack Benny
  • At what age do you think it’s appropriate to tell a highway it’s adopted?
    – Zach Galifianakis
  • My kitchen floor is sticky, and I had to do something about it. So finally I went out and bought some slippers.
    – Sarah Silverman
  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
    – Lana Turner
  • A hotel minibar allows you to see into the future and find out what a can of Pepsi will cost in 2030.
    – Rich Hall
  • Never be in a hurry to terminate a marriage. You may need this person to finish a sentence.
    — Erma Bombeck
  • If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.
    – Clint Eastwood
  • Never try to tell everything you know. It may take too short a time.
    — Norman Ford
  • My parents used to stuff me with candy when I was a kid. M&M’s, Jujubes, SweeTarts. I don’t think they wanted a child; I think they wanted a piñata.
    – Wendy Liebman
  • Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?
    – Robin Williams
  • I got my hair highlighted because I thought some strands were more important than others.
    – Mitch Hedberg
  • Never argue with a doctor; he has inside information.
    — Bob Elliott
  • Life would be tragic if it weren’t funny.
    – Stephen Hawking
  • Never trust a man when he’s in love, drunk, or running for office.
    — Shirley Maclaine
  • People always ask kids the same stupid questions. “What are you supposed to be?”
    I’m supposed to be done by now. You wanna move it along with the 3 Musketeers?
    – Jerry Seinfeld
  • It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married.
    – Robert Frost
  • This mall Santa seems insulted that I put down that protective paper before sitting on his lap.
    – Conan O’Brien
  • Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.
    – Andy Borowitz
  • If at first you don’t succeed… so much for skydiving.
    – Henny Youngman
  • The holiday season: a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.
    – Dave Barry
  • A watched pot never boils, but it does get paranoid.
    – Lesley Wake
  • Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
    – Groucho Marx
  • Sidste 12 engelske citater

  • The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
    – Demetri Martin
  • If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.
    – Theodore Roosevelt
  • Reality continues to ruin my life.
    – Bill Watterson
  • If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
    – George Carlin
  • My dog was my soul mate; we both took naps, we both skipped lunch, we both hated the vacuum…
    — Elayne Boosler
  • Too much agreement kills a chat.
    – Eldridge Cleaver
  • If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in a library?
    – Lily Tomlin
  • Being president is like running a cemetery: You’ve got a lot of people under you, and nobody’s listening.
    – Bill Clinton
  • My uncle Sammy was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone: What are you looking at?
    – Margaret Smith
  • Where there’s a will, there’s a relative.
    – Ricky Gervais
  • Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.
    – Elbert Hubbard
  • I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep. During the night, the tape skipped. Now I can only stutter in Spanish.
    – Steven Wright

Så er du kommet igennem alle 60 engelske citater. Husk på at denne liste var bygget op af den sjove kategori. Der er en del flere som kan komme på denne liste, men så vil jeg også gerne høre fra jer. Brug jeres tastatur for at kommunikere med mig, enten ved at bruge kontaktformularen eller også kommentarfeltet som kan finde længere nede på siden.

Håber du kunne lide denne liste.

Hav en fantastisk dag.


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En kommentar

  1. I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. Denne er en af mine absolutte favoritter. Generelt synes jeg W. C. Fields kom med mange gode citater 🙂

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